Its gear Gym but not as we know it

I think I dress for the gym as well as any woman who wakes at 5.30am to get there. My Motto is “ if it’s clean, its coordinated”.. let’s not push what my definition of clean is either as that stretches from freshly washed , to not too smelly but certainly not one something that could be used as part of the Saw attraction at Thorpe Park!

I read the article with a mixture of disbelief and amusement yesterday.. is this really what it has come to for Theme Parks…. ??

I mean I got excited on the “Grand National” and the “Big Dipper” at Blackpool without the need for a marketed “signature stench”. Thinking back maybe it would have been sweat, lager and vomit mixed with the waft of popcorn after Scotch week…

On Friday Thorpe Park are holding a contest and a £500 cash prize for the most pungent-smelling urine which will then be used alongside other smells in the maze. Why pay £500? I’ve been down a few alleys in London (no comments please) and the stench from stale urine almost made me lose an eyebrow…

They could just wander around London collecting smells and then give the money to charity. It’s not as though you couldn’t find any samples, just hang about the pubs, hell.. I even saw a man in a suit whip it out and pee against the “Britain at War” building in London Bridge at 8.30am one morning. Well… I did also see a discarded pair of black lacy knickers (not mine) outside the Pret at London Bridge too so maybe it’s just that area… or maybe it’s just me?

However, it will be great publicity. I bet someone who wins this will be really proud. I don’t envy entertainments manager Laura Sinclair who is choosing the winning sample

She said: "We want SAW Alive to be as authentic and terrifying as possible to make visitors feel as if they are living in a real-life horror film. To do this we need to really push the boundaries of what our guest experience from a sensory point of view. “

Suggestion – how about Thorpe Park doing the experience of a packed Jubilee line to Canary Wharf on a hot August morning???

Anyway – back to gym gear … Ok maybe later

Stairs.. the toughest challenge?

I know I can't be alone in this....

I have built myself up to an hour on the stepper. I have coped with the boredom, the pain... and the laughter from a work colleague who came to check if I had accidentally glued my feet to the stepper and needed assistance....

So why did three flights of stairs at work this morning have me gasping for breath and reaching for oxygen??

Maybe this lunchtime I should just walk up and down the stairs for my training. It could be interesting as I am known for being clumsy and have already gone down a flight on my arse in December...

Stairs.. the greatest challenge ?? Or Just the subconscious way of your body saying "No, turn back" when it thinks of work....

Think on this question.. the answer is yes." And so it began.

This was the second time I had been asked to take part in the charity trek along the Great Wall of China and for some reason this time I said " Yes". Out of my comfort zone?? That is putting it mildly... I am not known as a gym bunny. I was built for comfort, not for speed.. and sure as hell not built for doing 120k in 6 days unless on a bus... But it will be done and I do know that I will be done with lots of Northern humour, a few swear words, chocolate and sore knees.....

Due to a fellow blogger I have agreed to do some of it in marabou fur slippers, a negligee and promised photos. I will be wearing something underneath so it won't be for the strong stomached!! I will put other photos up but maybe not my visa one as I look like a giant head plonked on top of a green coat.

4 weeks to go until China so this blog is starting as promised.. the musings, ramblings and even rantings of a Northern Pie Eater, as she attempts to fall in love with the step machine, find a negligee and her pelvic floor muscles through pilates...